Sunday, November 8, 2009

Humbled.

As I sit down to write this post, I am humbled by God's grace. It is actually hard for me to find the right words to express my thoughts because I am overwhelmed with feelings. I feel amazed, extremely happy, confused, sad, thrilled, shocked and grateful all at the same time. Depending on the moment, these emotions have been our life for the past six weeks. With lots of prayer, Chris an I actually decided to pursue our second adoption; however, out of respect for several of our friends and Tegegn, we decided that we would start the process quietly. We wanted the focus to be on our son and not on our adoption this time around. Our plan this time was to adopt a little girl from Ethiopia. As we progressed with the paper chase and only had a couple of items left to complete (home study and fingerprints) before turning in our dossier, God decided to reveal His plan to us. Towards the end of September we placed our adoption on hold because we found out that we are expecting. Not only were we shocked to find out that I was pregnant, we were even more shocked that I was ten weeks along when we first found out! (I have to tell you - I tried to think back about everything that I did and the worst thing I could come up with was waterskiing...whew!) To say the least, we have had a lot of emotions recently. To be honest, I had to really switch gears because I was already praying for my little girl in Ethiopia. I was really confused why God is allowing us to experience this when we were more than satisfied to adopt His beautiful Ethiopian children into our home. Please do not think that I am not excited about this pregnancy. I am thrilled and grateful. I think I have a mix of emotions because I understand infertility. I understand the pain and hurt that it can cause and I reached the point where I accepted it and I am simply humbled that God decided to give us this opportunity. I am extremely happy and pray daily for a healthy baby. When we found out that we were expecting, I actually went to my fertility doctor because they knew my history. When I showed up in his office, he was shocked to see me. I was one of the patients that he never thought he would see again. I think he kinda had me on that list of people he thought wouldn't get pregnant. After three visits, I was cleared to return to a local doctor. I am on quite a bit of medication and once a week Chris has to give me a shot, but overall this should be a normal pregnancy. Chris was able to hear the heartbeat for the first time on Friday at our local doctor's office. How amazing! We couldn't get enough of the sound. On Wednesday, we will be seventeen weeks along. We have been talking to Tegegn about the baby. Tonight, he decided the baby was thirsty and shared his water with the baby by putting his sippy cup upside down on my belly. He then proceeded to call it bubba for baby and gave it a kiss and high five. The moment was priceless. Tegegn will be a wonderful big brother to this baby and eventually another Ethiopian sibling.

21 comments:

Jess said...

God is amazing and has just showered you with blessings! Congratulations on this wonderful news! I am so excited for you! Love ya!

Wendi and Mark said...

We are THRILLED for you!! This is so exciting! We will be keeping you all in our thoughts and prayers. And Tegegn's response is absolutely adorable! Thinking of you guys and hope to see you soon.

Wendi and Mark

Emma and Greg said...

Yeah! How exciting! Congratulations to you all! :) What a beautiful family... we cant wait to here more updates on the Ponz home front! Take care all of you and again CONGRATS!

Lauren said...

OH MY GOSH, PONSLERS!!! CONGRATULATIONS! And yes, I'M SHOUTING! I'm so so so thrilled or you! Wishing you continued health through the next 27 weeks!

Melissa said...

Chris! Sarah! I'm seriously working so hard to hold back my tears of joy at the moment (I'm at work, and have an appointment coming at any moment ... so definately have to keep it together!). Been following your family via your blog, and am thrilled that you'll soon have another little one entrusted to your care. God IS good!

Kevin said...

God is great!! I seriously cried a little when reading this!! I am sooooo incredibly happy for you guys and this new adventure!! Congratulations!! You both deserve this!!

ashley said...

we are so happy for you and happy you can have this experience. tegegn is going to make such a great big brother! :)

Dina said...

Oh my gosh!!! That is SOOOOO exciting. Tears in my eyes as I share in this joyful moment. I am super duper happy for you guys. I will be praying for you lots and lots and lots! Much love to you 3.5!

Adam, Julie and Tootsie said...

SARAH!!! We are SO excited - I'm tearing up here! Congratulations - what a beautiful family!! We love you all and can't wait to hear all about this next part of your journey!!

Gina said...

Ponslers! I am so, so, so happy for you. How truly awesome that all FOUR of you have been blessed in such a magnificent way! love to you all.

The Kuniks said...

I am so happy for the both of you! It's amazing how life happens when you least expect it! Thanks for sharing your news!

The Bells said...

WOW - CONGRATS!!! We are so excited for you guys!!! Tegegn will be a great big brother to bubba! :)

Hope to see you guys soon!
Chris (Becky & Hudson)

Emily said...

Oh my goodness!!! I'm just catching up on all the blogs and I am so excited to read this! God is so good and sometimes just plain confusing!!! What a wonderful gift He has given your family.

I will be so interested to hear about your pregnancy. Aaron and I adopted the boys before ever trying to get pregnant and now we are considering trying to have a biological child. Weirdly, I am afraid I couldn't possibly love a biological child as much as I love Grayson and Abram! So, I will be anxious to hear about some of the emotions you are experiencing!

Congrats again...we are praying for a healthy mommy and baby:)

The Davis' said...

Isn't it funny how His perfect plan sometimes is not what we envision. I am so happy for all of you and can't wait to see both of the lil ones...maybe we can catch up at Relay in June.

Again, congrats!
Lori (Kara's Sister)

Laura said...

Wow Sarah! That is amazing!!! Praying for your continued health! hopefully we will get to connect with you guys soon!

Janet said...

Wow!!!! Congrats Chris, Sarah and Tegegn!!! We'll also pray for a healthy pregnancy and delivery :)

Adriene Riggle said...

YEAH!! This is so exciting! I will have to say, after you adopted Tegegn, I had a little private thought, wondering how soon it would take for you to become pregnant. Scott and I have had so many friends be told that they would never be able to have babies, only to find out that they were pregnant shortly after adopting. This was my wish for you and Chris, as well. Take comfort in knowing that they had healthy pregnancies and babies. God is so good!! It just shows that God is far superior to anything human.

Brandon said...

Good thing you like mini-vans :)

I'm really happy for the 3 of you!

Kim M. said...

One word...MIRACLE!! I have tears of joy in my eyes as I read your blog...I am so excited for the two of you!! We really need to catch up and go to lunch soon. Congratulations!! :)

Lindsey said...

Congratulations, Ponslers! I was SO happy to hear your news. You deserve it! Praying for a healthy baby and a happy family of four!

Jen said...

Weeping at God's goodness. His blessings abound when we are obedient to Him. So excited for all 3 of you!!!